Before the date
- Look for the ✓ Verified badge, or ask for a quick video call first.
- Search their name and photo online. Real people leave a trail.
- Always tell a friend who you are meeting, where, and when. Use Share My Date.
- Keep your home address, work address and last name private until you trust them.
On the date
- Meet in a busy public place, for the first and second date.
- Drive yourself or take your own ride. Leave when you want to.
- Watch your drink being poured. Never leave it alone. If you step away, get a new one.
- Keep your phone charged. Stay in control. It is okay to drink less or not at all.
- Trust your gut. You never owe anyone a second date, a reason, or a conversation.
🍸 The Angel Shot
Many bars have a secret code to help you if a date feels unsafe. Go to the bar and order an "Angel Shot." Trained staff will step in quietly.
- Angel Shot, neat: walk me to my car.
- Angel Shot, on the rocks: call me a ride.
- Angel Shot, with lime: call the police.
Some places say "Ask for Angela" instead. Not every bar does this, and the words can change from place to place. Look for a sign in the restroom, or ask the bartender when you get there.
Red flags
- They ask for money, gift cards or crypto. Never send money to someone you have not met. This is the number one scam.
- They won't video chat or meet, always with an excuse.
- They rush you: "I love you" in a week, or pressure to move off the app fast.
- They get angry when you say no, or push past a no in any way.
- Their story changes, or their photos look like a model's.
Green flags
- They are happy to meet in public and let you set the pace.
- They keep their word and are kind to servers and strangers.
- They ask about you and remember what you said.
If you need help now
Danger right now: call 911.
National Domestic Violence Hotline: 1-800-799-7233 (or text START to 88788)
RAINN Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-4673
Crisis or suicide help: call or text 988
Report a member any time with the Report button on their profile.